Lost your libido? Here’s how to fire up your sexual desire

Feel like you’re never in the mood for a little hanky-panky? You’re not alone. Low sex drive is quite common – but there are ways you can get it back.

While all adults can go through fluctuations in their sex drive, a libido that goes walkabout for a prolonged period of time can be a tricky situation for all concerned.

Loss of libido (sex drive) is a common problem for both men and women.

But when it starts to affect relationships, it might be time to seek help.

What causes loss of libido?

Although each person is different, it is normal for women’s sexual desire to fluctuate, according to a Jean Hailes for Women’s Health report.

And while it is often assumed men are always “up for it”, a Portuguese-led study found almost 15 per cent of men surveyed reported a troubling lack of sexual desire lasting two months or longer.

There can be both physical and mental causes for libido to go AWOL.

“These may include being in unhappy or sexually unsatisfying relationships, feeling stressed or tired, hormonal changes, ageing, medication side effects and physical or mental health issues,” sex and relationship therapist Lisa Torney says.


How to regain your libido

Most people who have lost their libido though will at some point want it back and there are ways to tackle the issue.

Talk it out – with or without expert help

“There are many ways to address this and talking about what is going on for you is the first step,” Lisa says.

“Sometimes talking about sex may feel embarrassing or difficult.

“Sex therapists can help you have less awkward sexual discussions and explore ways to bring the spark back into your relationship.”

Look at your lifestyle

“Making changes to lifestyle may also help such as diet, exercise, reducing stress and prioritising time for intimacy.

Look at your diet

UK scientists found foods that keep the heart healthy will also assist with sexual health.

A Mediterranean diet including a wide variety of fruits and vegetables, wholegrains and plenty of fibre, healthy oils such as olive oil and seafood, nuts and legumes, can all play their part in helping to keep the fires burning in the bedroom.

Foods that might directly boost libido, often called aphrodisiacs, are generally high in zinc and include oysters, lobster, red meat, fortified breakfast cereals and pine nuts.

Written by Sally Heppleston